ARTICLES

NEWS

ROAMIN' CATHOLIC

Contents © 1998
by Jim Holman.
All rights reserved.

They are Petrified of this Woman

ST. JAMES' SCHOOL'S SEX-ED CONTROVERSY

By Lesley Payne

Therese Buehner-Metzger felt fortunate to have her two children enrolled at St. James Catholic School in Torrance. Competition for entrance is tough and waiting lists are long for Los Angeles area parochial schools. So it was that Buehner-Metzger thought carefully before risking her daughters' school situation by going against the wishes of St. James' School's principal, Sister Mary Margaret Kreuper, C.S.J., and asking that her third-grader be kept out of the sex education class.

The request ultimately resulted in Buehner-Metzger's two daughters being expelled from the school, with Buehner-Metzger now persona non grata at St. James parish. Her organization "Concerned Parents and Parishioners Committee" was viewed a "conspiracy" (said Buehner-Metzger) by both the principal and St. James's pastor, Father Tim Nichols. When Buehner-Metzger distributed copies of the Vatican sex-ed directives The Truth and Meaning of Human Sexuality at a meeting of the group, she says Nichols decried it as unofficial, stating the document, promulgated by the Pontifical Council for the Family, "doesn't have an imprimatur."

Buehner-Metzger became concerned about Sister Kreuper's methods back in 1994, when the sister started pulling her two girls out of class to "counsel" them. Buehner-Metzger confronted the principal, asking her if she suspected child abuse. "Of course not, or I would have called Child Protective Services," replied Kreuper, adding, "but it does fit the pattern--depression, possible oxygen deficiency at birth." The nun requested permission to contact the family physician regarding her suspicions of "oxygen deficiency," which Buehner-Metzger denied. After Buehner-Metzger sent a letter describing the bizarre exchange to Kreuper and the pastor, the sister backed off. Buehner-Metzger says her girls were both receiving excellent grades, were honor roll students, and that she received no complaints from their teachers.

Buehner-Metzger later discovered that other parents had had similar run-ins with the principal.

When Buehner-Metzger first spoke to the third grade teacher about her concerns about the sex-ed program, the teacher agreed to find another way to keep her daughter busy during that period. But Sister Kreuper then intervened and told Buehner-Metzger she would have to pick her daughter up and remove her from the school grounds during the sex-ed class. According to Buehner-Metzger, Kreuper then began following Buehner-Metzger around the school, making Buehner-Metzger move her car numerous times while she was leading afterschool Girl Scout meetings, and pulling her children out of classes for "counseling."

Buehner-Metzger and other concerned parents at the school had by then formed the Concerned Parents and Parishioners Committee, sending a flyer to all families on the school roster. Kreuper immediately sent a letter of response to all parents and began calling parents into her office one by one, demanding to know whether they had participated in the committee. Many parents who had been involved backed out, for fear of having their children expelled from the school.

Kreuper's secretary, Linda Eich, and two other women attended the committee's first meeting, held May 1997 at a public park. Eich and a friend taped the proceedings; the other two women demanded to know the people's names. "One man asked me," says Buehner-Metzger, "why I let them record me. I said I don't have anything to hide." Buehner-Metzger said Eich and her three friends left immediately after applause broke out in response to Buehner-Metzger's comment that "Sister and Father Tim say if we don't like it, we can find another school and parish. I say, if they don't want to be authentically Catholic, they can find another school and parish!"

Parents attending the May 27 meeting (about 60 people) were given copies of Human Life International's critique of Benziger Family Life, the school's sex-ed program. "Sister's people insisted that we read it the graphic portions of the Benzinger Program out loud," says Buehner-Metzger. "But it was scandalous. I would not have felt comfortable saying those things out loud. They tell the teachers to practice saying these things alone because they might have trouble saying it in front of the kids. Doesn't that tell you that maybe it's not appropriate for the kids to hear it? It goes into graphic detail about intercourse. That's just what the Truth and Meaning of Human Sexuality forbids."

Notes Buehner-Metzger: "The teacher's manual for the fourth grade Benziger program suggests that the teacher present grade six material to grade four students. This is the section that talks about the mechanics of intercourse. How will the parents know what's being presented? This is on page 30 of the fourth grade teacher's manual. A parent might okay the fourth grade book, but not see that in the teacher's manual."

Since the May meeting, Buehner-Metzger has received numerous complaints on the voicemail she set up for the Concerned Parents and Parishioner's Committee, some about the sex-ed program and some about other problems with Sister Kreuper. "They are petrified of this woman," says Buehner-Metzger. "It's like a mafia or something. I said at the meeting that if we don't speak out nothing is going to change.

"[Sister Kreuper] has no respect for parental authority at all; neither does Father Tim. He is knowingly condoning these things. People go to him and tell him." Buehner-Metzger notes that Father Nichols complained about the fact that she kept writing letters to him and Sister Kreuper documenting conversations and meetings with them. "He said he does not like being contacted in writing," says Buehner-Metzger. "He told me that if I want to discuss something with him, I should talk to him in person."

Another woman noted that, with just a few weeks left before the deadline to fulfill the 150 of the 300 volunteer hours that enable a lower tuition rate, Sister Kreuper informed parents that the Archdiocese of Los Angeles instituted a new rule that all school volunteers must be fingerprinted and have tuberculosis tests. Sister told parents that if they did not get this done immediately, their volunteer hours would not be counted and they would not receive the partial tuition refund promised parent volunteers in the tuition contract. A parent who called the Archdiocesan Schools Office to complain about this was told that the archdiocese has no such rule about fingerprints and TB tests.

Sue Lesniowski removed her child from St. James School during the Christmas break and is now homeschooling him through American Martyrs Church in Manhattan Beach. She notes: "A priest told me in confession that I have a responsibility to tell people why I'm leaving the school." She first became concerned about the school's sex education program when she was contacted by her brother last spring. "He read me his daughter's fifth-grade sex-ed test. There were things on there I didn't even know. I just cried. My husband got on the phone too. We were shocked. This was at a Catholic school in Lancaster, Pennsylvania." The Lesniowskis then began questioning what was being taught in their son's family life class at St. James. "We went to the principal and talked about this. She told us that we were the only parents that complained." Lesniowski later discovered that at least two other families had complained by that time.

The Lesniowskis'investigation of the sex-ed program also coincided with a class the couple was taking at a nearby Protestant Church, Growing Kids God's Way, in which they were studying a unit on moral innocence. Lesniowski said they met with Father Nichols and offered to purchase the Growing Kids God's Way program for St. James parish. He said he would have Sister Kreuper review it. "She said it wasn't Catholic," says Lesniowski. "Neither is Benziger, but it has an imprimatur!"

Lesniowski later discovered that the Catholic school she had attended had used a previous Benziger sex-ed program, I am a Person. "That's what I had in third grade in 1969," she notes. "I remember that our next door neighbor had pulled her kids out of the school and had tried to fight it. Even though I hadn't spoken with her in 25 years, I wrote her a letter and told her I admired what she did. She said it was great that something she had done back then had made a subconscious impact on me--the idea that you have to answer to God for your child's moral education.

"In 12 years of Catholic schooling I got a worthless religious education. The education I have in the Faith now is what I got when I came back to the Church, because of people like Buehner-Metzger. If we don't save this generation of kids from this, it'll be a disaster."

Notes Lesniowski: "I was supposed to teach Sunday School at St. James. I declined because it was all New Age stuff--God is in the trees and God is in the grass."

Sister Kreuper declined to be interviewed, after being told the nature of the parent complaints. Father Nichols did not return phone calls.

The number for the Concerned Parents and Parishioners Committee is (310) 361-5781.

TOP